Everybody in the Pool, Even the Black Kids

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'Pride'Black people can't swim.

Oh, wait -- they can. And a new movie is out to debunk the myth and show you blacks can have a wicked jump shot and an awesome breaststroke too.

'Pride,' now out in theaters, stars Terrence Howard as Jim Ellis, a former competitive swimmer who, after being turned down for a teaching job at a white prep school, starts an African-American swim team in Nicetown -- one of Philadelphia's rough "hold on to your purse and wallet" neighborhoods.

Niiiice.

While I haven't seen the movie yet, I'm sure like any other based on a true story, feel good movie about at-risk youth, the kids in 'Pride' learn to swim, battle racism, believe in themselves, and become champions.

Think of it as 'Glory Road' in the pool. (Hmmm ... 'Glory Road in the Pool' ... maybe that movie title was already taken.)

Yes, Virginia, black people can swim, but here are a few reasons why this black female doesn't:

1. The Hair: Every black woman (and probably ever black man who's ever known a black woman) reading this just went: "You Know!" Water is a black woman's kryptonite. Point blank. Growing up, my white friends would ask "Why are you carrying an umbrella? It's bright and sunny today." True, but as a black woman, you can never be too prepared in the battle against air moisture. Rain clouds can appear any second, leaving you with a nappy mop of hair. So the mere fact swimming entails entering a body of water -- makes it a no-no for me. Becky can easily put her wet hair up and roll. Black women need a blow dryer, a bucket of hair grease, flat iron, a few hours and a prayer.

2. Ashy Skin: A dip in the pool zaps all the moisture out of my skin and I look like I've been rolling in baby powder. Not ... cute.

3. Seriously, review reasons 1-2 again.

4. I always wonder ... who's peeing in the pool? Is it that kid? What about that one over there avoiding eye contact? Perhaps it's that one ...

With that being said, here's why black people SHOULD swim:

1. According to a recent report by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, African-American children are more than twice as likely to drown than white children, due to a lack of involvement/access to swim lessons or water activities. So unless you want your kids to sink like a rock, it's time to hit up that local swimming pool. Plus, swimming is one of the best ways to blast calories and get into tip-top shape. You can burn almost 400 calories/30 minutes doing the breaststroke. (Summer is just around the corner ...)

2. Blacks have already taken over sports we used to be underdogs -- make that nonexistent -- in, such as golf (i.e. "Tiger Woods ya'll, it's all good ya'll") and tennis (i.e. Serena & Venus Williams). You could be the next Michael Jordan of swimming.

3. Isn't reason #1 enough for you? If you like living and breathing, it should be.

More on BV Sports: Blacks and Swimming

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