Winston Bennett was an NBA player, former coach and star for the Kentucky Wildcats. I grew up watching Bennett play and admired his ability. One thing I don't admire, however, is Bennett's off-the-court behavior. In a recent ESPN interview, Bennett admitted to having sex with roughly 90 women per month before he got married, and half that many women after his wedding.
Bennett says that he would meet women nearly everywhere: "Malls, restaurants -- let's not forget -- prostitutes, massage parlors." He spent a chunk of his time occupied with sex. "I spent a great deal of time either having sex, cruising for sex, calling for sex, looking for sex," Bennett told ESPN. He also claims that he "very seldom" used protection.
Bennett claims that the NBA lifestyle gave him unbelievable access to women. "One was never enough," he said. "Three or four in a day was very typical for me."
While this may almost sound like a hero bragging about his conquered territory, the story doesn't have a happy ending. Bennett had sex with a woman the day after he got married and gave his wife two sexually transmitted diseases. Also, the fact that he had sex with thousands of women without protection means that he has infected quite a few women in his life. To make matters worse, there are thousands of Winston Bennetts in the world that you will never hear about. Sex is not to be taken this lightly.
While I am certainly not one to judge the sexual habits of Winston Bennett or anyone else, perhaps there is a lesson to be learned. I spent many days working in the Wildcat Lodge, the dorm that housed the basketball players at the University of Kentucky (where Bennett once played as a college superstar), and I would see one beautiful woman after another dragging her purse up the steps of the dorm, only to see her coming back down the steps in the middle of the night, with her hair in a complete mess. Some of the players would have multiple women come to their room in one night, and the women almost always thought they were the one that the athlete was going to choose to marry or date exclusively. But then again, maybe some of them didn't.
What's most interesting is that many of the women who did end up with the prize of marriage to a professional athlete found out years later that they were actually the loser in the lottery. Some have found that marrying an irresponsible man with millions of dollars, a massive ego, too much temptation and very little sexual discipline was a recipe for disaster. Perhaps Elin Nordegren, the wife of Tiger Woods, has some interesting stories to tell.
In the age of AIDS, we have to be careful. Sex is a beautiful process and is meant to be enjoyed at some point in our lives. There's nothing wrong, though, with being cautious and making choices in moderation. The Winston Bennett story is just one piece of a great national tragedy and an even bigger piece of the sexual challenges of the African-American community. We've got to do better than that.
Finally, the idea that Bennett is confessing his sexual sins on national television only serves to support the stereotype of the black male athlete as an oversexed animal completely devoid of personal responsibility. Rather than doing a national media tour, perhaps Winston needs to go somewhere and reflect on his lifelong commitment to ridiculous behavior. Winston Bennett doesn't represent me, and he is not anyone's role model. His story is one of the saddest I've heard this month.
Dr. Boyce Watkins is the founder of the Your Black World Coalition. To have Dr. Boyce commentary delivered to your email, please click here. 

Comments: (69)
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By: Mocha Dad on 3/17/2010 12:03AM
AIDS is a real threat to the black community. It's sad to see someone who is so irresponsible.
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By: concerned american on 3/17/2010 9:21PM
My heart goes out to the people who are innocently infected with HIV(Aids)or other deadly STD's, because of their partner careless promiscuous behavior.
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By: dopaw on 3/18/2010 1:18AM
Whoaa!!! Oh well. Wilt Chamberlain.
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By: Kelvin on 3/17/2010 5:07AM
Thousands of young men a cross this country will read of this man's exploits and consider him some kind of hero.
Disgusting!
And people wonder why 39% of black women are infected with genital herpes...
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By: GodSent Empress on 3/17/2010 12:10PM
Whose to say that all the women he was with were black? Think Tiger Woods requirements, his preference of white meat.
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By: rh on 3/17/2010 10:20PM
It's not all the mens fault black women are infected. Promiscuious behavior runs both ways.
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By: Deut818 on 3/18/2010 7:11PM
In this day and time.. if anyone gets infected with a sexual disease by willingly having unprotected sex doesn't get my sympathy and black females certainly aren't exclusive..
..if by chance you believe Bennetts' story..these women were standing in line to have sex with bennett and more than likely unprotected.. so let's get off this make-shift BLAME stuff.. however, std's and HIV isn't escalating with blackmales..only black females..WHY is that? It is my belief in part- bisexual females are infecting each other..however the black community doesn't want to touch the issue..
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By: Johnnie` on 3/21/2010 11:36AM
You are absolutely right, Kelvin. This idiot wears his "conquests" over women like some badge of heroism. What a sad, shallow, misogynistic, fool.
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By: mlwiley on 3/17/2010 9:17AM
My first impression is why would a media want to air this. Then, EUREKA, we need to know the dangerous people who walk among us and
if his words are more trustworthy than his concern for his family and society, now the "consorts" know their "valu-esless-ness."
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